Communicating with Teenagers – In Their Own Words

Do you sometimes feel that when you communicate with your teenage son or daughter, it seems like both of you are talking about the same topic but using different languages? I do. At times, when my 16-year old son speaks with me, I feel like I’ve been warped to a different universe or time zone. I’d usually end up blinking my eyes, totally at a loss at what he just said.

My son teases me about my seemingly-amusing reaction and would patiently explain what he meant using some “old school term” (his words, mind you) just so I’d get it.  I hear acronyms like LOL, BRB and IDK all the time that I sometimes couldn’t help rolling my eyes. At first, I was mildly annoyed. It took a while but I eventually I caught up and can now fairly communicate with the kids using “their language.”

Ok, so I mentioned LOL, BRB and IDK a while ago. Just so we are all on the same page (for Moms like me who kind of need some catching up with teen language), here are just some of the usual Teen terms that I have gotten familiar with and what they mean:

• BRB – be right back. Yes, instead of uttering all three words, they abbreviate it.
• LOL – laugh out loud. This is fairly basic and is actually a chat acronym until I heard it being spoken out. For instance, instead of saying “Mom, that’s funny,” the kids will say “LOL Mom”
• IDK – I don’t know. I get “IDK” when at times I ask the kids about some item that I may have misplaced.
• DL – download. They’d say “I already DL’d that recipe you asked me to.”
• My Bad – meaning “my mistake”
• BFF – Best Friends Forever. The kids declared me as one of their BFFs. Yey!
• Chillaxin – Chilling and relaxing

The list goes on and on… And yes, we heard it a lot of times – “the only thing that’s constant is change.” In every generation, teen language also tends to evolve depending on the highlights and major influences of the prevalent culture. Seeing how different media platforms have influenced the younger generation is such a marvel.  Information travels so fast these days from one end of the world to another that it only takes one click, and zoom! Information is accessible to practically everyone at anytime. A big part of its powerful influence is the continuous evolution of the way young people communicate be it verbal or written.

I must admit, as entertaining or as novel as this may seem, I did worry about how this has influenced their writing skills. With the paranoia of a typical OC Mom, I checked on their essays and their completed home works. I breathed a big sigh of relief when I saw them still using correct grammar, spelling and punctuation.

I see no problems with some of these language variations. As long as disrespectful words are not used (and no cussing please!), that’s fine with me. In fact, in my experience, learning to adapt to their language keeps me “in the loop” and makes bridging our age gaps pretty much natural. It makes it easier and more comfortable for us to converse about things that matter. It’s sort of a smooth conduit that allows us to share our individual way of thoughts and feelings in a manner that is often light, fun and engaging.  

Healthy communication with my teen is something that I take seriously. If it sometimes entail learning their ‘lingo’ to be able to continue maintaining our lines open and to further keep tabs with what’s going on, count this Mommy in.